Managing the self or just giving in

Actually real quick I'm genuinely curious rn how are some people so eloquent with their words and colourful with descriptions? Speed to respond and with wit are some fantastic boons God can bestow I think.

Anyways... I realise the title and bio might make it sound like this is about lust but it's not. At least not directly.

I'm at a low right now when it comes to managing myself. It's now 2am. I've been so good at putting myself to sleep by AT LEAST midnight since January but old habits have crept in like a thief in the night and left me void of the good ones I replaced them with.

Don't you ever excuse yourself to divulge a little in some niceties every now and then? Is that something we should celebrate as humans or shun? On the one hand without pleasures and leisure life turns sour and dull simultaneously. But there on the other hand we slip from artistic recuperation straight into the mire of sloth and demotivating complacency.

:l

It does feel good to just give in every now and then. I mean. At least until the morrow. Actually sometimes I genuinely think I feel more alert and fresh on the mornings after an unplanned all-nighter. Is that a controllable source of inspiration and creativity or a trap of the devil to lure me deeper into his unachieving sloth??

How do you work leisure and recuperation into a schedule though?? Sometimes I can go months without lapsing in laziness so it might be unnecessary to force.